4 units available · Bath & North East Somerset

You ordered
the pizza.
Now order
the hug.

Cuddle Ambulance dispatches a trained, DBS-checked responder to your sofa in under forty minutes. Entirely platonic. Boundaries agreed in writing before we knock.

Request a unit See how a call-out works
A heavy cream knitted blanket folded over the arm of a dark grey sofa
Median response
34 min
03:14 — Unit 6 stood down, subject asleep 21:40 — Two blankets requested, one provided, one declined 14:02 — Sunday hangover, Code Duvet, 38 min 19:55 — Responder brought own mug 03:14 — Unit 6 stood down, subject asleep 21:40 — Two blankets requested, one provided, one declined 14:02 — Sunday hangover, Code Duvet, 38 min 19:55 — Responder brought own mug
Dispatch protocol

Three steps, and none of them involve explaining yourself.

We do not ask why. Sunday afternoon, a bad week, a flat that got too quiet — the reason is yours and we don't need it.

01 / CALL

Tell us the postcode

Order in the app the way you'd order a curry. Pick a response level, add anything we should know, and we'll show you who's coming before they set off.

02 / AGREE

Set your boundaries

A two-minute form. What's fine, what isn't, and whether you want talking or silence. Your responder signs it before leaving. It cannot be changed at the door.

03 / DISPATCH

Someone knocks

They bring their own blanket. They take their shoes off. They stay for the booked time, and they leave without making it a thing.

Response levels

Priced like a takeaway. Trained like a service.

No membership, no subscription, no minimum. Cancel up to the moment the unit is dispatched and you're not charged a penny.

Code Blanket

The Drop-In

£39 / 45 min
  • Forty-five minutes on the sofa
  • One responder, one blanket
  • Talking optional, silence respected
  • Median arrival 34 minutes
Request
Code Duvet · most requested

The Full Recovery

£89 / 2 hrs
  • Two hours, no clock-watching
  • Responder brings tea, and makes it
  • One film, chosen by you, not discussed
  • Priority dispatch — median 21 minutes
Request
Code Nightwatch

The Overnight

£149 / to 8am
  • Stays until morning, on the sofa
  • Separate blanket, always
  • Breakfast made before they go
  • Two references checked, not one
Request
On shift tonight

You see who's coming before they leave the depot.

Every responder is DBS-checked, holds two independent references, and has completed our forty-hour training in consent, de-escalation and knowing when to shut up.

Portrait of a responder

Nadia K.

Three years on the vans. Exceptional at silence.

Unit 02 · 412 call-outs
Portrait of a responder

Ade O.

Former hospice volunteer. Brings his own mug.

Unit 04 · 288 call-outs
Portrait of a responder

Marta L.

Nights only. Will not let you apologise for calling.

Unit 06 · 519 call-outs
Portrait of a responder

Tom H.

Makes the tea without being asked. Leaves on time.

Unit 09 · 174 call-outs
Dispatch log · anonymised

A normal Saturday.

Published weekly, with permission, because people ask what a call-out actually looks like.

13:48CODE BLANKETHangover. Requested no conversation. Watched forty minutes of a cooking programme neither party was following.
16:20CODE DUVETBreak-up, day four. Subject talked for ninety minutes. Responder said eleven words, all of them "mm".
19:02CODE BLANKETMoved to the city in March, knows nobody. Booked again for Thursday before the responder had left the building.
22:37STOOD DOWNSubject's friend arrived unexpectedly. Call cancelled at the door. No charge applied.
01:15CODE NIGHTWATCHFell asleep at 01:40. Responder stayed on the sofa until 08:00, made porridge, let themselves out.
A blanket over a mustard armchair beside a window, with a cup of tea and slippers
The bit that matters

It is not that kind of service, and we are strict about it.

We get asked. So here it is in plain words, and these are conditions of employment, not aspirations.

01

Fully clothed. Always. Both parties, the entire time, no exceptions, no negotiation at the door.

02

Boundaries are signed before dispatch. Anything not on the form does not happen. Responders may not ask you to amend it.

03

You can end it at any second. Say the word, they go, you're charged for the time used and nothing more.

04

Every responder is DBS-checked and holds two independent references. We check them again annually.

05

The van is real. Livery, first aid kit, spare blankets. It parks round the corner if you'd rather the neighbours didn't.

Questions people actually ask

Go on then.

Is this a sex thing?

No. It is the opposite of a sex thing, and we screen hard for people hoping otherwise — at booking, at training, and on the doorstep. Responders work in pairs on any call-out flagged during screening. Ask us anything about how that works; we'd rather answer it than have you wonder.

Who actually books this?

Mostly ordinary people having a bad week. Our biggest single group is people who moved cities for work and haven't made friends yet. After that: recently bereaved, recently divorced, and students in January. About a fifth of our call-outs are hangovers, which is where the name came from.

What if I cry?

Then you cry. It happens on roughly a third of call-outs and every responder is trained for it. Nobody will tell you it's alright, because you know that already.

Can I request the same person again?

Yes, and most regulars do. Availability depends on their shift, and we'll tell you honestly rather than sending someone else and hoping you don't mind.

What happens if it goes wrong?

Every call-out is logged with a start and end time and a check-in text to a number you nominate. Complaints go to a named safeguarding lead, not a support inbox, and we publish the outcome of every upheld complaint in our annual report.

Do you cover my area?

Bath, Bristol and most of North East Somerset tonight. Cardiff and Exeter from October. If you're outside that, put your postcode in and we'll tell you when we're close rather than pretending we already are.

Dispatch · open until 04:00

Someone will be with you shortly.

Four units on shift. Median response thirty-four minutes. No subscription, no membership, no explaining yourself.

Request a unit